How in THE WORLD am I supposed to write in Starbucks, when the monk behind me is using an iPad?

I have this swirling, pessimistic algorithm I use.  It’s called the “bail of hay” theory.  In summation:

  • I’m driving a convertible along Route 66
  • Overhead, a C-130 drops a bail of hay from altitude.
  • Said bail of hay’s trajectory meets that of said convertible–perfectly.

It’s sort of like Murphy’s Law, but it’s one I tend to internalize more.

Such is the case with now.  Whatever kind of seething, nether-wraith from the ninth pit decided it would be most swell to hit me with this OCD–invoking anachronism knows good and well what it’s doing:


Sure sure.  I’m aware that not every sequestered man of the cloth has lept of the white cliffs of Benedictine poverty, but c’mon.  An iPad?  I can’t write now.  St. Augustine’s probably scouting Limewire for “sweet flows.”  I simply do not have the compartmentalist talent to ply my trade with such conflicting worlds.

And besides. He’s probably reading my blog.


This entry was posted in Reading, Uncategorized, Writing and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to How in THE WORLD am I supposed to write in Starbucks, when the monk behind me is using an iPad?

  1. mammaflybox says:

    Haha, I wouldn’t be able to write either!

  2. What does a person of the cloth peruse on an iPad? Most curious. Perhaps, behind this image hides a great story to be told…
    Thank you for sharing. When in a convertible always drive with one eye toward the sky.
    AnnMarie 🙂

  3. I actually have met a few of these guys in Home Depot. Nice they are. Industrious to a fault. Russian Orthodox to be exact. But I HAD to have a foil–he was going to be it!

  4. Steve says:

    I spend time at a The Abbey of the Genesee in New York. It’s a Cistercian (Trappist) abbey, and they are very industrious. They follow the Rule of St. Benedict in a strict observance known as Order of Cistercians of the Strict Observance (OCSO). It’s a peaceful place with walking trails and some retreat houses for personal and group retreats. Thomas Merton was a Cistercian monk, in Kentucky, and the 88-year old retired abbot, here, knew and worked with him. He has some good stories about him. They are very hospitable, according to the Rule they live by, and they do embrace technology. However, they usually don’t leave the abbey grounds so you would not be apt to see them in Starbucks with an iPad,

    I don’t know much about Russian Orthodox. I saw some Orthodox people in Jerusalem when I was working for a couple of weeks in an Intel plant in central Israel, many years ago.

    I have the same pessimistic algorithm I use in my life, and I also internalize quite a bit. I’ve learned personality traits seem to form early in life and remain remarkably consistent throughout the rest of our lives.

  5. Jason says:

    May I just say how much I’ve laughed reading these posts of yours. I’m a political devote and an anti establishment type thanks to you and the summer of 1990. Thanks, I guess. Haha.


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